Friendships Reclaimed
When I lived in Switzerland approximately 100 years ago, I had one very dear friend, Birgit. Last Summer I went to visit her after an absence of 29 years. During those years, we had emailed occasionally, mostly on birthdays, but even that had entirely stopped the over last 5 or 8. I was going to be in Switzerland, and I thought it would be wonderful and interesting to see her again.
The visit was lovely and upsetting. That we had allowed an entire lifetime to elapse, that we had not shared the ups and downs and sideways of our lives, felt like a loss we could not recover from. But we persevered. I decided it was too important to neglect, and proposed that we meet again this summer. And so we did! She, her husband Jure, and our friend Tschu Tschu just spent two days together in Valais (Swiss Alps) hiking and talking and eating, and working to become easy with one another again.
It defys reason, but I find our friendship sound and whole, sturdy as a Walnut. I still find her as lovely, lively, funny, and sympatico as when we were in our 20's. Jure and Tschu Tschu are exactly as wonderful as I remember them from long ago. To find that I have this little pocket of friends here is amazing And wonderful, especially when I consider how different the contours of our lives have been. These three have been remarkably stable – looong continutity of relationships, locations, and occupations, while over these years I have moved through several different combinations of place, person, and pursuit. Nonetheless, somehow, the bones of compatibility remain, and reaching across decades, we are re-establishing trust and presence.
Plus which, I happily dusted off my Swiss German, and found it fully functional, as if preserved in amber.
So here's to lifelong bonds that hold, even through the longest pause. And here's a reminder to not let go of people who are important to you and to tend those relationships with care.
Tomorrow I head out to Chamonix, the launch pad for the last stage of this endless journey.
More on that anon.